Woods-s-sen

Guess what I did the other night?



Went FOUR-WHEELIN'!



Yes, you read that right.

hahahaha! E was having a rough time, and feeling down again -- so she asked me to meet her and her b/f for a drink, locally.
I hadn't seen her in about a week anyways, so I went. We all had some laughs and she turns and says, "How do you feel about four-wheelin'? Right now."

I looked at the time, it was almost 10 pm. "Let's do it."

E's b/f has a Jeep with a wench (thing that pulls the Jeep out if we were to get stuck) on the front and he's been dyin' to get stuck.

It was hilaaaaaaaaarious! E told me to sit shotgun since I'd never gone with them. So, we're flying around on the muddy, rainy hills on this path.
We're cracking up laughing, especially when E says, "It's so fun back here not being able to see what's going on up there and bouncing all around!"
Then,
I said, "You know what would be awesome? If we saw a ghost right now! Especially with Halloween and everything!"
E says, "Ehhh, nah. Not so cool."
But her b/f says, "Oh my gosh, yeah!!! That would be crazy! What would you do if you just saw a white ghost floating over there by the trees pointing over to the right?!"
(And that...right there...is why I love this guy for E. Imagination. He doesn't burst my bubble, but only ADDS to the excitement by making up a scenario that seems more realistic....NOT just, "Oh yeah, that would be kinda cool." He provokes thought by saying, "What if it was pointing to something?")
Instantly, I became even more excited! "Oh my gosh!!!! Could you imagine??? What would you do? I would freaaaaak OUT!"
E: "Okay, that's enough of the ghost talk. I don't want to see anything."

5 minutes later...

Me: "I just keep picturing an old ghostly man walking down the side of the trail."

Drunk Elephants

Elephants electrocuted in drunken rampage

Good thing glass isn't smell-thru

Over the weekend I went about 4 1/2 hours away with R for his cousin's wedding. I don't really know his parents that well yet, let alone his whole family, but thankfully my best guy friend N is his brother, so he was there, too.

So, we're at the wedding reception and N and I go outside to smoke a cigarette. We're standing there and in between our conversation we hear others around us. Suddenly we heard a slow, quiet-but-getting-louder 'brrrrrrRRRRRrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRR'. Seriously, it went on forever. We look over to see these older men and women totally trashed and one of the men was kind of standing with his butt out. The sound was his ass blowing up. He started cracking up laughing, and then everyone else around him did, too. N and I look at each other like, "Wow, really?" but of course start laughing, too. We look back over and the man's wife says, "Oh my gosh! You guys could hear that all the way over there?" We nodded. "I swear he's not mine," she said.

Then (and this is the best part) he says, "Operation: Break Window!"

Again?!?

So, only a few weeks ago when the whole Jack sage was going on -- I saw my Ex. Well, last night a group of us went to the hockey game (sooo fun! There were a couple bad calls and fans were getting so mad and throwing stuff out onto the ice! ha!).

Anyways, afterwards we went out for a few drinks. We went to this place that I hadn't been to since St. Patrick's Day when I lost my wallet there. A friend of mine and I went downstairs to use the ladies room, and when we came back up the stairs, I look to the guys in front of me and there he is! Again, the Ex!

Also again, we did not speak. We hardly made eye contact. I told my friend and she said, "Did you say hi to him?"
No. No. Andddd...No.
Again I said, "We had a reallllllly bad...ending."

Why is he showing up everywhere all of a sudden?! I haven't run into him in at LEAST 4 years, and now I see him twice in a month!?!



Oh yeh, as for the costume for Halloween, I believe I'm gonna go with the green skirted one! Thanks for your input!

Draino

I'm back from my lovely weekend away visiting my mum in South Carolina. And wow, I feel exhausted! Seriously, I just keep resting my chin on my hand while I space off for minutes at a time. And I'm not gonna lie...I've been screening calls here in the office just to avoid talking on the phone. Like right now, an old lady is leaving a 2nd message, and this 2nd message is totally unnecessary. "You guys have been here before," she's explaining. Okay, really, that's great and all, but that's why I have this handy computer here with all our customer's information in the system.
I cannot wait to get out of here.

In other news...(it'll be quick news because I have NO attention span today) --
My dad says this morning: "What did you do to your mother?"
Me (SD): "What do you mean?"
Dad: "What'd you do to your mother? I have already gotten 2 phone calls this morning from J (my stepdad) saying she wants to come home."
SD: "Well, I didn't do anything! Really!"
Dad: "Yeah, I know, I'm just messing with you. But really, she wants to move back up here."

So, I talk to mum and she said she was very sad after I left yesterday and she cried and moped all night until she went to bed. J asked her if she wanted to move back home and she said yes.

I confessed to her that I too cried, and had to hide in the bathroom stall at the airport yesterday.
She wouldn't be coming home until summer time, but still...I will be sooo happy!

Think I had other stuff to say, but I forget. (Surprise, surprise...) Sooo, until next time...farewell!

Sex Doll

HAHAHAHA! I can't wait for "Lars and the Real Girl" to come out in local theaters! Described as a "wholesome, old-fashioned film about a churchgoer who falls in love with his sex doll," Ryan Gosling is the lead! I LOOOVE Ryan Gosling!
The movie is supposed to be kind of a dark comedy, and those are my favorite. It really sounds hilarious. I read about it in Yahoo! Entertainment here.

Well, I am sure I had other things to talk about, but this whole sex doll thing kind of gave me a mind block. ha!

I'm off to see my mom in South Carolina for the weekend, so peace out suckas!

diaper time dancing video

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" -- It's my FAVORITE show EVER!!!

And this is just one reason why...

Purple-Yurple!

What Color is your Soul Painted?

Purple

Your soul is painted the color purple, which embodies the characteristics of sensuality, spirituality, creativity, wealth, royalty, nobility, mystery, enlightenment, arrogance, gaudiness, mourning, confusion, pride, delicacy, power, meditation, religion, and ambition. Purple falls under the element of Earth, and was once a European symbol of royalty; today it symbolizes the divine.

Halloween Costume Poll

Which one should I be???

The Jack Saga continues...

So, last night I had a benefit to attend for children with cancer. I went last year as well, and it's quite fun. There are vendor booths set up with skincare products, jewelry, purses, and food. There's also a Chinese Auction. One of my good friends works for a real estate company and they have a little station set up there, so I go to keep her company, drink wine, eat cheese and crackers, and shop a little (it's for charity!).

So, I went and met up with my friend and E was already there, too. So, we were all looking around and chatting, having our wine. E went to the bathroom and says, "I'll meet you back out here in a minute."

I walk to the edge of the huge room where everyone is and look in. I notice a cute looking guy, with a woman. As I am looking at him for what seemed like forever but really was only a few seconds...we lock eyes, and to my greatest surprise I realize, "Holy shit! That's my EX!" from about 5 years ago!

I turned around and walked into the bathroom. "E, OMG, an EX of mine is out there!"
I was amazed, ever since we broke up (it was a bad, bad breakup) we haven't seen each other anywhere! It sucked that he still looked cute, but whatever.

E and I left the bathroom, went and got more wine while I pointed him out. And that was that.
Oh yeah, and I bought a Dior necklace that I LOVE!
******
Moving on, after the benefit I stopped over at the friend's apartment that I was at Tuesday night. The girl that puked in my car was there as well. They said I could stop over and they'd finish cleaning up the vomit. Eww. Okay.

So, I'm sitting there chatting with my guy friend while they're politely cleaning my car outside when he informs me he got into an ASSLOAD of trouble for the stolen horse. He said he was totally bitched out, but no one knew who did it for sure.

As it turned out, this little old lady had an antique appraiser there a bit ago and he was going to give her $90 for the horse, and $60 for a rocking chair. He went to pick up the items yesterday when of course, the horse was missing. The lady freaked, confronted everyone in the building, called the cops, the whole 9 yards.

When I left, I stopped over E's and informed her. She was instantly upset because she loves the horse (Jack) and won't give him up but is afraid of karma and just genuinely feels bad and doesn't want my friend to get in trouble. "Wow, good thing I didn't take the rocking chair, too! I thought about it!" she told me.

So, today she called him to ask him what she should do. We came upon the decision to give the lady $100 in an envelope with a small note only saying, "Please accept my sincere apology and this gift of money for your troubles regarding the horse." They're going to slip it under her door!

It took us awhile to figure out exactly how to word the short note. "Thanks for the horse." Nah, that sounds kind of mean. "Jack has a great home now." HAHAHA--nooooo, can't say that either. "Sorry, we thought it was trash that was going to be thrown out." Negative. Then we discussed the topic of fingerprints and that maybe we should wear gloves when delivering the envelope. Actually, E is giving it to my friend because she doesn't want to go anywhere near their apartment complex! HA!

I could do nothing but laugh my ass off.
Jack sure is a hot commodity!

Meet Jack

Last night was crazy---like a Saturday night kind of crazy! First, I went to lunch with a friend yesterday and ran into ANOTHER friend of mine I hadn't seen in awhile. She invited me over to hang out that night and catch up, etc. So, I pick up a 6 pack and go over. We hang out for about an hour and a half and then I had plans to go to this local bar. This friend informed me there was a Beerfest competition there. Teams of 5 (paying $20/team) were competing in 5 events: chugging, quarters, beer pong, relay races, and flip cup. It's every Tuesday this month. Well, we wanted to see what it was all about!

So did my friend E, so I left my friend's place and she was going to meet us there in a little while with her boyfriend. I picked up E and off to the bar we went. At first it was pretty dead, and nothing seemed to be going on. I asked the bartender, "I thought there was a beer competition tonight?" She said there was supposed to be, but nobody signed up! WHAT?! I couldn't believe my ears!

Anyways, a few other friends of mine that I run into sometimes show up. They were also quite devastated.

We all were drinking, singing karaoke and having a grand time.

My 2 guy friends wanted to leave, but his girlfriend and her friend didn't, so they asked if I could take them home. "Sure, no problem."

So, when we left, I stopped at Sheetz while E and one of the girls went inside. The other girl was practically half asleep drunk in my backseat and she started moaning. I said, "Uhhh, are you gonna puke?" and she moaned a faint "yeeeeaaah".

Uh oh. Okay.

So, I get out of the car while I'm saying, "Okay, let's just get your door back here open for you," and when I opened it her head was drunkenly hanging off the seat and there was a yellow-orange puddle of vomit on the floor of my car. "Ewwww," I ran inside and told her friend and she apologized and came out to clean it up. "Well, at least it's all orange juice from the screwdrivers she was drinking!" Ohhhh, okay, well that makes it all better!

But, I wasn't mad, shit happens.

SO THEN, we get them home and the boys had to come out to carry the girl into their place. They invited E and I in for a drink, so we went in. Then, to go and smoke a cigarette we had to go down through their apartment complex to their garage.

Well, there's a storage area in the downstairs for all the residents and E and I spotted this wooden rocking horse out in plain sight! We grabbed it and stuck it right in the middle of the floor. Then, we got reprimanded so we left it and went to go smoke.

We just had to have the horsey.

We convinced one of my guy friends to steal the horsey, transport it to E's apartment, and we'd pay him $20.

He did!

picture from www.grammaknowseducationaltoys.com

We had mucho fun riding Jack (haha) and we even signed our names on the bottom of him. And in spirit of Halloween coming up, his last name is O'Lantern. Oh, Jack didn't have any eyes either so we gave him some with a Sharpie.

So...that's how the story of Jack came about. He now resides in E's apartment, and we named him Jack because "we jacked him!" We're gonna dress him up and pimp him out! Great night!

WTF?!?

The other night I had a super weird dream. Of course, I can only remember bits and pieces of it. But, it had to do with a guy - I'd say in his early 20s, that killed himself. For some reason, I was in the house that he lived in - hanging out with friends. I think maybe it was the guy's roommate we were hanging out with. Anyways, I'd been in his former bedroom changing or something, and weird things would happen. Like a stack of about 8 pictures would suddenly be right smack in the middle of the bed. Like he wanted someone to see them. After I'd mentioned something to the roommate, that's when I became aware of the guy that killed himself. Then, suddenly a few of us were out in this huge yard burying his guitars. There were 2 of them, and I asked why we were burying them and one of his friends said that's what he would have wanted us to do with them.
And...that's it. That's all I remember!
Weird.