How would you like to start off your day by seeing one of these?!?!?Yesterday started off as a normal day...but it soon reared it's ugly head as a Monday. I always stop for coffee in the morning, so when I put the car in park, I reached over to the passenger seat to grab my purse when what do I see???
A HUGE ASS SPIDER right next to it!!!
I am not exxagerating either when I say HUGE. It was probably the biggest one I've ever seen. I froze, knowing there was NO way I was gonna go in and get my coffee, then get back in the car to drive the 5 seconds down the street to work.
So, I got my cell out of my purse (while not taking my eyes off this huge, furry monstrosity in fear it would scurry at lightning speed for me). I dialed my dad's number, he answered.
"Daddy! You have to help me, there's the biggest spider I've ever seen in my car!!!" As he starts to ask me questions, I see a friend of mine getting into his truck.
"Ohhh, oooh, there's M - maybe he'll get it out for me! Hang on!" So, I frantically run over to M's truck. He looks out the window at me, smiles and mouths 'What's up?' as he rolls the window down. There was no time for small talk.
"M!! You have to help me! The biggest spider EVER is in my car, you gotta get it!"
So, I tell dad, "Nevermind, M's gonna get it out for me."
M follows me over to my car and I say, "Hang on, I gotta unlock the door, it's on the other side."
He glances into my car and says, "Ugh, it's not that big thing over there is it?"
"Yes!!! Yes, I told you it's huge!"
"Eww, well I'm gonna need to get something, I thought I could just pick it up real quick and get rid of it!"
So, he grabs a cup and tries to scoop it up -- it falls. I scream, afraid that it's gonna crawl under the seat and escape M's grasp, and ultimately torturing me further. But M hurries and gets it in the cup.
"Thank you so much!!!" I say. M leaves to get to work, and I finally go in to get my coffee.
It caused quite a scene though, because everyone kept asking what we were doing and what was in my car! Thank god I did not see that thing while I was driving!!!
I even had a nightmare about it last night! Now, I am paranoid as all hell.
My dad has been cracking up laughing and told me to do the "Indian spider dance" before I get into my car.
This is just like the time I had borrowed my mom's boyfriend's car a few years ago. When I opened up the gas tank, maggots fell out everywhere!!! His co-workers had decided to play a trick on him on his last day at that job. Well, funny joke -- thanks, because now I am traumatized for life.
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5 comments:
my god, people are so squeamish about tiny, tiny little creatures!!! Both of my roommates are total sissies about spiders and keep calling me to get rid of them.
Ugh. You can soooo take those little fuckers. They're Miniscule compared to you!!!
Spiders are AWFUL! Did you read about that poor little boy that had TWO spiders living in his ear? That would give me nightmares for the rest of my life.
I would rather face a serial killer than an arachnid. You have my sympathies!
Haha... Man - that is scary shit!! I took my dog out one morning and he was sniffing around in the grass and out he comes with a, literally, 2 inch spider on his head. 2 freaking inches!!! I swatted it off his head and then ran up the street like a crazy lady because I thought I swatted it on me... haha... Good times with big ass spiders...
TAB: It looked gigantic first thing in the morning ... before coffee! Ahh..who am I kidding, it didn't matter what time of day it was, the thing was HUGEEEE!
CS: Ewww. No, I have not! But, now I have the urge to clean my ears!
Amber: haha--but what if it was a serial killer dressed as a spider? Awww shit!
Erica: Don't ya just love when people see other people doing crazy things because of bugs! I run around screaming when there's a huge bee around me!
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