Please Apply First

*This post is going to come across like I am a terrible, heartless person....but I really need to vent. I'm not always like this!*

You know, a friend and I have been joking for awhile that we need to have guys fill out an application before we date them. I wish that really happened...though, I guess if you do the online dating thing that's pretty much it right there. But, for us that don't have online profiles at pleaseloveme&spendmoneyonme.com it's pretty difficult. I also wish that I could print out a paper with 'rules' or a disclaimer of some sort.

Anyways, I've been dating R for a couple months. I like him, we get along and have the same friends...but, lately he's getting more & more clingy. And I hate clingy. I think he gets "jealous" or something when I am hanging out with other friends and he's not around. It's weird. One night I was going out to meet a friend and I called him when I was on my way for a short conversation. I told him I was meeting up with my friend and he got like, "Oh, you are?" The LAST thing I want is to be dating someone that has issues like my ex did. DO NOT EVER make me feel guilty, or that I need to have a "reason" to justify my going out. Whatever...I brushed it off. I've had to talk to him a few times about how I am not ready to be anyone's girlfriend again, that I do like hanging out -- and I'm not seeing anyone else, but I just enjoy being ME. That's one of the reasons why the ex and I broke up back in November.

Last night, I decided to have just a couple friends over to hang out and have some drinks out on the deck since it was super nice out. He knew this was going to be happening. They were MY plans that I made for me. He was working until 9 anyways -- at least 40 minutes away from where I live. Well, he called me on his way out of work -- says he was stopping at his parents, did I feel like having another person over? I told him I didn't think we'd be hanging out very late, so it was kind of pointless. (And, his parents house is about 15-20 away from me, so it's a far trip for him to make it all the way there, then all the way back to his apartment...just not a practical idea, any of it.) So, he says, "Oh okay, well call me in a little while."

About 5 minutes later he calls. Just to tell me something stupid about one of our friends that called him. (Umm...it's not like I'm sitting around doing nothing, I'm hosting 2 friends.)

THEN, I get a text saying, "I am just gonna come over, I wanna hang out."

I texted him back and said, "I don't really think I feel like it." (or something like that)

OF COURSE, as I had predicted, my phone rings. I answer it.

R: "Well, why don't you wanna hang out?"
me: "I don't know, I just don't feel like having anyone else over, and..." (who knows what I even babbled about)

R:"Well, it's just me though" (EARTH TO R! Don't you get it?! I just don't wanna hang out tonight!)

me:"Yeah, I know..but..." (and I babble more)

R:"Okay.....AWWWWW, but I WANNA COME OVER!" (Who does this?!?! waaaaaaaaah)

me:(losing patience) "We've been together the past 4 days!"

R:"Yeah.........well, okay...call me later then."

(Obviously I just really don't like feeling smothered. I'm always trying to tell him not to revolve his plans around me the way he does. "Be your own person!!!")

Then, after awhile he calls me asking if our friend A was still over. I know he was probably upset because I had the house to myself all night & he wasn't over. A was like, "You know if he comes over here, he'll end up crashing here" etc. and he's already stayed over a couple times, I just wasn't in the mood for a sleepover or anything. I just wanted to hang out with friends.

Then, the rest of the night I get texts from him asking him to call me when I get a chance because he's upset about something at work and really wants to talk.

After A left, I passed right out.

Twice today he mentions how he wishes I would've called him back and how he hardly got any sleep, and how he's freaking out, etc.

me: "Okay, okay, well what's wrong? What's this problem?"
R:"I don't know, I just really don't like working until 9:00"

(Are you freaking kidding me? THIS is what he's been soooooo distraught about?)

I told him he should pretty much just suck it up...it's his JOB! And he just got promoted --- he doesn't work until 9pm EVERY night -- and he doesn't work weekends. It's not like he's really missin' anything.
I mean, he's NUTS about it. And I THINK it's because he thinks he's "missing out" on whatever I am doing. And that behavior there is so much like the ex was. So, I even said to him, "I think you're just scared of missing out on stuff." (I'm kind of blunt that way.)

Yeah, I could tell that pissed him off because he tried to be like, "Well, I'm gonna let you go." So, then I think, "Shit. I'm such a bitch," and I say, "Well...I mean, there's no immediate solution, why don't you just talk to your boss when she gets back from vacay."

R:"Can we meet for lunch please? I don't know what to do. I slept for 3 hours, driving myself nuts all night. I don't work until 2."

So, okay, I give in. He comes over. Things seem pretty fine to me! Whatever with this "boo-hoo 9:00 bullshit."
When I get back to work I get a text from his saying, "Just being around you makes me feel better." Aww, how cute, right? That's all he needed? Was to drive all the way to my house for a half hour of hanging out with my bitchy self? Okay then!

I could go on & on, since it's all just pouring out...but I won't torture you anymore. (Sorry.)

Why do I always have to be more like the guy in all my relationships!!?!????!!!?!?!?!