Official Freakout

UGHHHHH!!!!! What a day! My phone got shut off. The bill is waaaay higher than it's supposed to be. All phone companies are the same. They all lie. So now, my phone doesn't work, I paid a little bit on my credit card, but I have to wait a half an hour to see if my phone will work again. If it doesn't, I'm going to jump out of a window. THEN, I realize that somehow after having tons of $ I am down to $100: $20 of which will be automatically gone tomorrow for my tanning package payment. Then, I have to go buy my ticket for the O.A.R. & Pepper concert that is happening in one week. That leaves $45. I cannot survive off of that. I mean, I have...but it reaaaaaaaaaaallllllllly sucks. I refuse, I have to get some $ off Todd. And rightly so, since about $180 of my money went to the 4th of July party. He didn't buy anything for it. So I ought to be okay. I better be, b/c I don't get paid again until next Friday.

New subject: 4th of July
Fun! Party went good, not too many people at one time...some early afternoon, some later, and some into the night. Had lots of food. Was gonna play drunk volleyball but Todd forgot to get fuel for our tiki torches! Damnit! We spent most of the rest of the weekend getting the house ready for people to see it. But on Monday, my night people was Pierce, Jimmy, Nate - they were the constants - and then Shannan, Johnna, and her 2 friends came over, too. Oh yeah, and Seth. Can't forget him. He called, and since my GHETTO phone that doesn't even WORK right now doesn't have caller ID, I was like, "Who is this?" (ntm earlier in the day someone called me TWICE & I had no idea who they were though I pretended I did...couldn't pretend anymore) and it was Seth and he was upset I didn't know it was him. But it was fun that he came over, b/c we hadn't hung out in forever. He lives in a house with 2 other guys now. He wants me to start coming over and hanging out.
Oh, and then Nate had a girl come over. He's been banging her and apparently she's a model even though I think she's not that pretty. Maybe her body - he says she's 5'11" but I don't think she's that tall....either way, her face isn't that cute. lol. My stupid friends recorded her cleavage on my video camera, too. She has an okay personality, though. I had no reason to be mean, so I was cool.

Last night, I had the BEST massage ever! Todd's sister (and my friend) Erin is in massage therapy classes and needed a subject last night. It was awesome! I felt so relaxed and careless. My body always feels so tense. I think it's tense without me even realizing it. So I got a full body massage for an hour. She lit candles and had soothing music playing. Some people think massages are supposed to be in a Dr.'s office or something more professional, but massages are supposed to be therapeutic. You're supposed to be in a relaxed, safe, and comfortable place, not in a bright and white room with scary tools all over the room. So it was perfect. And Erin told me more about stretching out my muscles more so they don't hurt and that sort of thing. She says pilates helps a lot, so I think I may take it up. I didn't like it before, but now I realize there's more to it, and it works you physically and mentally.

I think it's probably just the thing I need on a day like this (and I have a lot of days like today).